Kazatasupa (kazatasupa) wrote,

Locked Out, Keyed In

As soon as I shut the door I knew that I had left my keys inside the apartment... I don't know when Jared will get home and I guess it doesn't really matter. I've got Thelonious Monk on the head phones and everything is settling so well.

Dr. Keller gave me three copies of David Rothenberg's new book this afternoon... one for me, one for Jared and I'm going to offer the other copy to Will Taylor. The book is a gift, given on the condition that I read it and participate in a group discussion April 3 (which will be led by Rothenberg). Biloba... get a copy, if you have time to read.

I have my copy, and opened it for the first time as I sat outside Juice and Java and watched the sun set over western skys, pulling a plethora (my new favorite word) of colors down as time went to sleep - over the hill and far away. I skimmed through the first couple of pages and was caught brilliantly by a passage:

"There is no preparation for the improvising life besides learning glimmers of the background rules and not being afraid to bend them to fit the changing situation. I would not say push and pull the rules a bit so as to stay in the game that continually evolves. No, this is not a plea for moderation. The interesting life is not always a balanced life. Take risks for their sake alone." - David Rothenberg, 'Sudden Music'

All this time, I have been looking for balance and bored with it... somewhere along the line I lost my abilitiy to improvise, to play music with my life... to be an artist, not with a canvas, but with my life.

I've always endeavored to live my life as such, but somehow forgot... became lost, but now I'm found. I'm here!!! Right here.

Another note/realization - mmmm.. no, that's too private. Ah hah hah ha... ahhh.

Tags: allen, david rothenberg, dr. keller, jared, sudden music, will
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